21 comments on “Dealing with furious, raging people”

  1. Completely understand the truth of the matter… especially with ARGUMENTS AND Heated discussions going from “BAD TO WORSE”
    if only one can hold on to the horses… because…that one moment of maturity and control uses a fruitful restraint !

  2. i genuinely feel its easier said than done,as most often the other person is also in the same state of mind,and who is to hold the temper is the question …and someone who has reached that level of anger can never be subdued even during calm waters,and the storm will be back with a vengeance….they can never be made to realize that they have been rude and wrong..

  3. Like delegation, managing/ controlling of your anger is
    also a skill/ technic that everyone can learn.. First give
    Priority to your health eating healthy and nutritious foods
    which can help you to feel calm and content. Take break
    and relax. Avoid unnecessary and irrelevant arguments.

  4. Disappointment grief jealousy fear are the cornerstones of rage. Wanting to vent the feelings physically or verbally is the response to let the passion out. A good friend / relative is the supportive person that can calm the inner minds inferno like the gentle rain. Help the person to introspect and to channel the thoughts from one of violence to acceptance and to ‘ move on’. A herculean task no doubt but one that would help in retaining sanity.

  5. When it manifests as abuse, it has to be condemned. The person would need counseling intervention and may need a psychiatrist’s help as well. It is unfair on people around him to go through his angry episodes when they get emotionally affected, even if not physically.

    1. Good point, Bhooma. When the episodes of rage move into recurrent abuse, a professionally trained specialist will be needed for long term guidance.

  6. I have been in situations when people totally loose it – letting an employee go, telling a staff member they didn’t get a promotion…. These are challenging conversations. It’s very important to listen and have them express themselves. At the end of the day, most people calm down and look for support and direction.

    On the flip side, when I am upset with someone, I never speak with them on the same day. I always collect my thoughts and meet with them the next day. This gives me a chance to put things in perspective.

  7. Anger or one’s fastest reaction due to failure of simple logistics answer to a problem on hand
    It May be result of lack of expereince or knowledge or even planning;sometime a rash of anger can speed up and help in achievement;Anyhow anger is a positive response though explosive some times

  8. Hello Sir!
    Dr.Rangarajan once said ‘Anger is a sign of inefficiency’
    I have remembered that always
    Now your tips on how to deal with angry people will help 🙏

  9. Best not to judge whilst dealing with prople who are angry n best to empathise with them n get them to calm down.
    Anger happens for many reasons n we need to try n look at the big picture n ignore the trivial.
    Raising one voice only makes it worse.
    Takes patience n practise.. but thevresults are worth it.

  10. Handling angry people is one of those interpersonal skills which only comes with experience and time! I think firstly it needs empathy and secondly – tolerance. To sit patiently and listen to someone angry can be very unpleasant. It’s true that you let them vent out but all the same their choice of words can be piercing. And again, they are far from being receptive, so you can’t say much either and there’s no point in being defensive. So basically you bear the brunt of it and hope that they will settle down soon. But again, you wonder if you encouraging them, it’s like they are shouting for attention and you give it to them!!

  11. Arjun, This message should be “Brainwashed” in to children starting school. It is also a must for politicians! Unfortunately it only reaches people like you and me!

  12. Much like the anti collision devices that soften or avert a mishap, there are effective channels within us, to deal with bottled up rage or anger & prevent it from assuming violent & abusive forms.
    Like stress management, anger management too, must be practiced daily at an individual level. With patience, self control, deep breathing, yoga & meditation, the habit of getting angry frequently will be halted.
    It’s worth remembering- Though habits die hard, with effort, they do die.

    1. I like the analogy with air bags and such, Shobha. You have to have them in place, ready for action. Much like accidents, the need for such behavioural mechanisms is rarely predictable.

  13. Train your mind to

    see the good in people even though they are in rage .

    Always remember that the good..

    you find in others is a reflection

    of the nature that is in you..

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